How do you prepare to change your life?

How do you prepare to change your life?   I've contemplated this question often lately.   Changing your culture, part of your being, what regulates your schedule, your family, your values and ethics, and your pocket book.  Dairy farming is much more than a career, it's a culture of its own, a lifestyle, a story.   It started with a dream, a creation of something much bigger than a job or a few pennies in the pocket; like trying to create a garden exploding with  foliage but with only the seeds of hope and determination.    Our dreams became a reality four years ago, and now it feels as if someone is burning the blueprint we created in front of our own eyes. 

We had no illusions going into the dairy industry.   We knew full well how much work, time and effort it would be.   Money was not an expectation, but there was hope that there would be enough to survive.  Despite the downfalls of the dairy, the farm has been a blessing.   My children have learned responsibility, work ethics, have more knowledge in their little heads- anything from breeding cows, how to care for calves, to what type of chemicals we use to clean the barn lines- and have had priveleges that only a farm child can truly appreciate.   I see the pride and happiness that my husband has experienced, the hard work he has put into all areas of the farm, and remember the day we inscribed "The Crabtree Farm" into the concrete we poured.  Now his pride, self-esteem, and hope fade each day.    My own experience on the farm has exacerbated that of any job I could ever find as well, yet lately at the end of each day the barn floor catches my tears. 

After three years of unpredictable disasters beyond our control, which have compiled and caused utter chaos, I find myself trying to prepare for change.  We have one very small hope that we can continue, but it's about as big as a sliver in a pile of sawdust.  However, I am still praying and won't give up hope.  

But for now these questions plague my mind: How do I help my family, how do we prepare, what do we do, how does this work...?   With an uncertain future ahead, I have a very heavy heart.   When I ask these questions the first thought that comes to my mind is prayer.   All I pray for is for some peace for my family, to show us which way to go, and to guide us in that direction.   So, for anyone out there, please pray for my family.